Ever notice a big difference between playing WITH your dog and playing FOR them?
When you play for your dog, you might be trying to meet a need you think they have - to burn off energy, by chasing a ball and going for a run. After a long day at work sometimes you just want to collapse in front of the TV and we have all felt the guilt of our dog sitting at home waiting for us and so happy to see us when we get home.
When you play for your dog it usually involves going to the park and throwing a ball or letting them run around and release some of the energy or maybe catching up with doggie play mates and having a great time.
It is an activity that YOU are not the centre of attention with them. YOU are not playing with them. They don’t have to focus on you and something else is the centre of their world – a ball, a frisbee, a duck, a dog, a smell …. You get the picture.
So what ?
The not focusing on you is a behaviour you are conditioning with your dog that ripples out into all other areas of your life together – loose lead walking and recall being the main training ones. Both of these behaviours require the dog to be aware of you, where they are in relation to you and to listen to what you want from them.
When they are conditioned and practised to have their attention in their environment or on an object that is not you, they are not going to be conditioned or practised to focus on you when you need them to be.
Play WITH them to build connection and bring you back to the centre of their world.
Playing with them builds a connection between you. You are fun to be with – much better than all that other stuff.
How do I do that?
Try a game like hiding a few treats under paper cups. First, show them how it's done, and help them figure it out. Start with one cup, then two, then 2 with treats under and one without. You can make it more challenging as your dog gets the game. It's mentally stimulating and taps into their natural instincts to scavenge and forage using their incredible nose, making it far more fulfilling than just chasing a ball.
Hide treats around the house and help them find them.
A game of tug….and yes, it’s ok to let them win too.
Sit with them quietly and gently stroke them, maybe give them a little massage.
As your dog becomes more conditioned to focusing on you during the game, this conditioning has a flow-on effect to other parts of your relationship.
You'll find they're more tuned into you than the environment because you've become a rewarding part of their world.
With recall and loose lead walking they'll listen more readily and be much more aware of your presence. It really shifts your role from someone who just provides playthings to someone a dog genuinely wants to engage with. You become the most interesting part of the environment, which builds a deep bond and makes training feel like a natural conversation rather than a series of chores.
By transforming playtime from a physical outlet into a mental partnership, you create an environment where your dog chooses to focus on you out of curiosity and trust, setting the stage for a harmonious life together.
As we go into a hot Perth summer and the pavements are too hot to walk on, instead of having to go out in the heat, stay in the air con with your dog and play inside.
Play the paper cup game, hide some treats around the house, and help them figure it out.
Most of all have fun. :)